The Emoji Movie had me with low expectations with all the bad reviews and yet gave me some cheap shallow laughs. Just don’t think and you can get through it.

By Jeremy Say

The Emoji Movie is a piece of art, just not a very good one. Nuke this to kingdom come I say, this critically lambasted movie was obliterated by the currently controversial site Rotten Tomatoes. So it stands to reason that this movie had no chance at all at the box office. Yet, I find myself curious enough to attempt watching a bad movie. As it turns out, it’s not as bad as critics have decreed. While still a bad movie, I still would rather watch this than Transformers or Suicide Squad again.

The movie tells the story of outcast Gene (T.J. Miller), a multi-expressional emoji, and his quest to become normal. With obvious inspirations from Wreck-It Ralph, The Lego Movie (+Batman) and Inside Out, this comes out as nothing short of an unoriginal, late and unworthy attempt from the corporate suits. The only logical reason this movie was made, was for the ridiculous product placement ad money. I do assume you guys got paid to name drop Facebook, Instagram, WeChat, Candy Crush, Spotify, Dropbox, Just Dance, Youtube and Twitter?

While I can say that the movie got some laughs out of me, it were truly too few and far between. This is coming from a person who actually likes a good Dad joke. What really stopped me from enjoying the movie was they didn’t know when to stop. Considering that most of the jokes are at the expense of the poop emoji played by Sir Patrick Stewart, I gotta ask one thing – how much were you paid for this soulless role? Uncreative and just downright cringy, at least they paid homage to his role in Star Trek: The Next Generation and got one brief genuine smile out of me.

Here are just a few example you have to endure.

  • Old emojis are text based and yell out “my colon” in distress 🙁
  • Poop emoji punching one of those pedestal fans.

As a movie that is meant for children and yet seems to caters to adults, this fails on so many levels. Let’s move on and briefly talk about some of the main themes, stereotyping and feminism.

Be warned these are some major spoilers up ahead. Then again if you’re this far into the article, you might as well save yourself the trouble from watching this movie.

How or who thought of creating this mysterious female lead emoji named Jailbreak (Anna Farris) is beyond me. An escaped princess emoji in disguise, she spends most of the movie vocally and physically trying to fight stereotypes about female emojis. She goes on about how a lady emoji doesn’t have to be only a princess or a bride, with even straight up denying that princesses can summon birds by whistling. This only serves as a setup to change her mind, typically fall in love with the awkward male lead, abandon her dreams of freedom (it was even offered to her on a silver plate with her love interest wanting to join her) and prove that stereotypes are true. Oh, if you are wondering, she summons the Twitter Bird as a mount by whistling. By the way, couldn’t you have summoned it earlier and avoided all this time consuming mess instead of falling into the classic LoTR plot hole?

End of Spoilers

A tech fantasy movie, this is one you should not be watching with a fully functional mind in cinemas. What this movie is to adults, is just another fun way to create a drinking game. Just down a shot every time there is a shit joke, a sponsored app, or when they make something up about mobile phones and technology.

4/10

 

  • Rating 40%

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