I was supposed to write an article on why millennials aren’t dating, but all the stats tend to skew very Western. That being said, while going through endless Google search pages – I came across a couple of dating terms. I’m sure the concepts aren’t new, but the slang is. I’m starting to feel old.

Also, dating is hard and people are a**holes.

That being said, these terms only really started appearing colloquially once dating apps like Tinder came on the scene. Sure, some of these are terms you’ve heard or read about in some agony aunt dating column but your girl’s picking out the ones I’ve heard locally. No, legit. I’ve heard these used in actual sentences. I need new friends. What’s also interesting is that most older millennials (those of y’all who are between 27 – 32) haven’t heard of half of these. Do they not care? Is it not on their radar? All I know is that it pretty much blew Scott and Jeremy’s minds, so that was kinda satisfying.

Curious? Read on for some commonly used terms, and let me know if I’ve missed out on any of your faves.

 

Benching

That’s when someone stops hanging out with you or committing to dates, but they continue to tweet, text or snap you. It’s basically leading someone on. Can also happen before people have the DTR (see below).

 

Catch and Release

Wait, what? This for all those commitment-phobes who love the ‘chase’ but hate the commitment. That being said, once the object of their desires has been ‘caught’, they just nope out of there.

 

Cushioning

So, don’t do this. I’ve written about this. It’s when you date someone but you also have other pieces on the side (see benching above) in case this one doesn’t pan out.

 

DTR

In reference to The Talk, where you define the relationship. That’s where you move from the no-man’s land of casually dating and into something serious – if the stars align.

 

Ghosting

Where you don’t break up with someone, but you just disappear on them. Like magic!

Layby

Could also be referred to as serial monogamy. Someone who’s in a relationship, but is looking to get out. They also tend to lay the groundwork for the person they’d like to date next, or have a series of nexts even though they’re not technically single.

 

Shipping

In fandom, people ‘ship’ their favorite pairings – whether they’re actually happening (canon) or not (fanon). This happens in real life too.

Snack Pack

A playful name for the overnight bag everyone brings when they stay the night at someone’s house. A snack pack might contain things like makeup wipes, a toothbrush, perfume, etc.

 

Stashing

Refers to when someone is dating someone else, but has decided to hide them from everyone else in their life. Metro has a great article on it. It’s still not cool.

 

Zombie-ing

This is when someone who ghosted you tries to reinsert themselves into your life. Coming back from the dead, as it were. Trust me on this one: let it die.

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